And a time to let go

Somebody’s rocking the boat. It happens to us all, I know –sometimes with discouraging frequency.

One employee has had a headache for two weeks. Is she coming back? How do I adjust for the increased work load? I would just cancel my walk on the beach, except that I didn’t have one scheduled.

Another employee dropped the hint that she might be taking a position elsewhere. And so she might. We’ve done as well for her as we can.

That tauntingly elusive siren song sadist of a calm and well-ordered life is at it again.

And so, since lying awake in bed at night is so productive, I get up and finish the hourly payroll, except for the one employee who didn’t turn her time sheet in. It is the loose ends that scare me.

The loose ends. The unknowns. Back in bed, trying again, I remember the little pinch pot I made last week, the one inspired by

“…for inevitably we will come up against something we can not control. The attempt to control the future and the demand to be in charge of everything in our lives sentences us to a daily existence obsessed with life-numbing worry.” (The Spirituality of Imperfection, Kurtz & Ketcham)

I say it is a pinch pot, because I made it by pinching and slapping, but it is really more like a plate. I draped pieces of yarn across the top and over sides, and covered them with slip. I incised “And a time to” on the top of the plate and “to let go,” on the bottom.

There is a time to let go of the need to control the outcome. And the middle of the night, when my action options seemed limited, was a pretty good time to do that.

I went to sleep.